If the end was near would you want to know? Note the hilarious Artist's Rendition
Posted by on Friday, March 19, 2004
The Oval Inbox #1
Posted by on Friday, March 19, 2004 in - leave a comment
....actual email received in the Oval Inbox...
Hello Cathy Bartholemue, your attention is needed.
I will like to solicit your help in a business proposition, which is by nature very confidential and a Top Secret. I know that a transaction of this magnitude will make any one worried and apprehensive but I am assuring you not to worry, as all will be well at the end of this endeavor.
I am Mr. Issa Mohammed, Client Service Manager of African Development Bank Group. My partners and I have decided to seek your help in transfer of some amount of money requiring maximum confidence from my bank.
A foreigner, Late Dr. Edward Bartholemue, who is a citizen of your country and was an oil merchant and contractor with the Federal Government of Nigeria until his death onboard the ill fated Kenyan Airways bus {A310300} was our customer at the AFRICAN DEVELOPMENT BANK and had a balance of US$8.3 million which the bank now expects his next of kin to claim as the beneficiary.
So far, valuable efforts has been made to get to his people but to no avail, as he had no known relatives. More because he left his next of kin column in his account opening forms blank. Due to this development our management and the board of directors are making arrangements for the funds to be declared unclaimed and subsequently paid into the federal government purse. Usually, funds of this nature end up in the greedy pockets of some politicians due to our corrupt society.
To avert this negative development my colleagues and I have decided to look for a reputable person to act as the next of kin to late Doctor, so that the funds could be processed and released into his account, which is where you come in.
We shall make arrangement with a qualified and reliable attorney that will represent you in liaising with my bank for inconveniency of you coming to my country. All legal documents to aid your claim for this fund and to prove your relationship with the deceased will be provided by us. Your help will be appreciated with 20% of the total sum.
Please accept my apologies, keep my confidence and disregard this letter if you do not appreciate this proposition I have offered you. Thank you very much for your time.
I wait anxiously for your response.
Yours faithfully,
Issa Mohammed.
The President's Response
Dear Issa,
Thank you so much for sending me your letter. I can’t express how delighted I was to receive it. My staff and I have been getting many emails similar to yours. It seems like you folks in Africa are having a hard time getting rid of all that extra money. A clever chap here at the administration came up with a great idea to solve the problem you folks are having. We are developing an email campaign targeted at Widows of dead Nigerian Head of states, Government Agents in Nigeria, High Ranking Agents in Rebel Groups whose leaders have just been killed, and generally anyone looking to transfer huge amounts of money from Africa to North America. The first draft of the email for the campaign looks like this:
Dear Sir/Madame,
We have heard of your plight and have been moved to do something about it. We feel that it is an injustice that you cannot transfer your huge amounts of money to our continent. We are here to help.
We have set up a series of secure accounts with banks around the continent. We have used our political connections to ensure privacy, secrecy, and a waiver on all necessary paperwork to transfer in excess of 1,000,000.00 (one million dollars). We have done this especially for you.
In addition to providing you with the necessary account information to transfer your money, we have ensured that once received the money is safe. The accounts we have set up automatically transfer all funds to a secret linked account* once a deposit is made. This will ensure that the balances of these public accounts are always $0.00.
We thank you in advance for your massive amounts of money. It is the least we can do.
Sincerely,
The people of the Internet
*All funds collected will be donated to Carlos Porto’s Charity for Homeless Dogs
Issa, I hope that this will help.
Yours Very Truly,
Dan James (on behalf of Cathy Bartholemue)
The President of the Internet
If you have an issue you'd like to bring up with the President of the Internet please send an email to ovalinbox@ceoblues.com.
Great article on Google as a company
Posted by on Thursday, March 18, 2004
Wedding Blog
Posted by on Tuesday, March 16, 2004 in - 1 comment
The wedding is now only two months away. As promised we, well mainly I, have committed to blogging the wedding events for our friends and family. There's also a registry page. Coming soon will be profiles of the entire wedding party including Becky and I plus thoughts on traditions, colours, honeymoons, etc. Exciting times! Enjoy the site.
Best game name ever: The Battle for Bikini Bottom
Posted by on Thursday, March 11, 2004
No longer in San Francisco. Now home.
Posted by on Sunday, March 7, 2004
Damien Rice – O
Posted by on Sunday, March 7, 2004 in - 7 comments
Music used to be one of my core passions. That was back in the high school and university days when one searches for meaning and identity in the music they listened to and sometime played. Since then my passion in music has somewhat declined but in no way has it vanished.
Over the course of my music enjoying career I found a few albums that were true albums in every sense of the word. They were not just collections of songs but more of complete works from start to finish. I suppose it would be somewhat linked to movements in classical pieces. These albums have always stuck out in my memory as experiences, not just cd’s. I can remember when and where I sat back and listened to the entire album, start to finish. My most memorable albums were:
Grave Dancer’s Union – Soul Asylum
Rocket and a Bomb – Mike Knott
Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness – Smashing Pumpkins
Spilt Milk – Jellyfish
Let Your Dim Light Shine– Soul Asylum
Fluid – Mike Knott
Luckily I have recently discovered another album that I can sit back in my chair and be engrossed in from start to finish. I was first introduced to Damien Rice by my good Internet based friend John in a post he made about good songs you’ve probably never heard. Volcano, the second track on this album, was in his list.
This album is fantastic from start to finish. I thoroughly enjoyed it. The recording itself is remarkable. The detail in the voice and guitar work is fantastic. It is mostly a folky/acoustic album aside from a few dramatic and emotional build ups. There are also times throughout the album where Rice is backup up and shares the mic with a delightful female voice, balancing and smoothing out the overall tone. Highly recommended album.
No longer in Alberta, now in San Francisco - See Pictures
Posted by on Monday, March 1, 2004
I'm in Alberta. Photos are here
Posted by on Saturday, February 21, 2004
Buying a Building
Posted by on Monday, February 16, 2004 - 4 comments
When silverorange first started we began by renting space smack-dab in the middle of the industrial suburbia of our city. We were close to Wal-Mart, a gas station, a few car dealerships, and of course to top off the list, a large party-tent rental shop.
As the business grew the need for space increased. Over the first 4 years we essentially doubled the space we rented in the building. While the landlord was the nicest and the building quite dandy, we decided to move. More specifically we decided to buy our own spot.
We were plagued with the normal questions: Should we move downtown? Should we stay out of the downtown and find a nice ol’ big house with a lot of land? How much is it going to cost? What does insurance cost? Parking is a pain in the butt. How are we going to get around that? Etc..etc..etc…
So we began our quest to find the perfect spot. We had some friends help us along the way and here is our experience wrapped up into one small post for your future use: